Happy New Year All!

And here's to 2013!

A Little Thought To See Out 2012...

Dear, dear Yasmin:

The pressies were the usual nice and familiar stuff, except for that purple, satiny garment from my husband with a confusing number of straps and no instructions.

There! That'll set you up for 2013, won't it..? ;)

Post Title Of The Month

Also taking his cue from the Sandy Hook shooting, here's Captain Ranty:

Quote Of The Month

Seeing out 2012 is Bucko The Moose in his new incarnation, with this post on gun control:

I've seen many a comment in the wake of Sandy Hook that there is simply no reason for a citizen to own an assault rifle. I give you this: There is no reason to have a camera on your phone. We don't need a reason. We don't have to justify the things we purchase with our hard earned money. If we want it and have the money to buy it, that's no business of anyone elses and we don't need to justify it. The only caveat being, we don't do any harm to others with it.

Post Of The Month

And the last one of 2012 goes to Dick Puddlecote for this sad example of just how far the educational system has gone down the crapper...

Domesticated: unable to fend for themselves, tame, dependent...

...and that's not just the dogs:

...as any Siberian husky dog owner would confirm, despite their intelligence, it is not safe to let them off their leads.The active, energetic and resilient breed have an independent intelligence with an instinct to run, run and keep running.

So, to keep them safe, you need an enclosed area for exercise, or a LOT of your own land.

The Huskies In Hull group, which was formed to bring husky dog owners together, is now appealing for a place they can let their dogs off their leads safely.

And by 'appealing', who do you think they imagine should provide it?

Yes. That's right.

Mike Gibbs, group co-ordinator said: "You can't let them off their lead unless it is in a secure area.

"We need somewhere enclosed. An ideal place is a tennis court or something similar with a 6ft fence.

"The dogs need exercise, a walk with a lead is not good enough.

"They are not the type of dogs you can just sit on your lap and expect to be good.

"If you do not let them exercise, they get frustrated, they chew carpets and furniture and eat just about anything."

Well, Mike ol' chum, shouldn't you have thought about that before you chose your preferred pet?

Mr Gibbs said: "We do not see why the council can't provide some sort of doggy playground where we can let them off their leads safely, without charging us to do so.

"If they can't, we are ideally looking for someone who has enclosed land somewhere in Hull who wouldn't mind us bringing the dogs for a run-about.

"If anyone has any land we could use, that would be brilliant."

Anything else you'd like, Mike? Someone (the council, perhaps, font of all bounty  it seems) to provide you with free Pedigree Chum as well?

Musical Whimsy...

Not that I want to encroach on Bucko's territory here, but I was preparing a music round for a quiz, and noticed something.

Spot the connection:







 Are there any more?

Whew! What A Relief!

Collapse of civilisation? Never!

The 'Mainly Fail' Won't Change In 2013, I'm Betting...

Good old 'Daily Mail'. First, the headline:

Wow! A stuffed tiger, eh? Better click on the story.

Hmmm, hedging our bets are we? Now it's just 'stuffed animals':

And here's the ex-beast itself, identified in the caption as a jaguar.

It's clearly a leopard. Even for the 'Mail', that's impressive FAIL! you have to admit...

Sunday Funnies...

Something to watch out for in 2013...

And What Do You Think Now, Magistrates?

A mum who admitted screaming at an Indian to go back to her own country and being drunk in charge of a child was praised by magistrates for getting her life back on track.

Kelly Kociela, 31, abused an Indian member of staff at Sainsbury's Local on the corner of Longmead Avenue and Gloucester Road before being stopped by police during the afternoon while swigging from a can of lager with her children , six and ten, in tow.

Lovely, I'm sure you'll agree.

Magistrates told her: "Normally we would be looking at probation intervention. However we do see that you are making sterling efforts to get your life back on track and engaging with agencies that can help you."

That was back in March. And since then?

A mother who turned up at her children's school while drunk has been banned from the premises after she bit the deputy headteacher on the arm.

Kelly Kociela appeared 'emotional and slurring' when she turned up at Filton Avenue Junior and Infant School, in Bristol, where she demanded to take her two youngsters from a club. She then became abusive to staff in a 30 minute ordeal during which she bit teacher Matthew Cox, Bristol magistrates heard.

Shocker, I'm sure you'll agree...

The court heard she had previous convictions for being drunk in charge of a child in 2005, 2006, 2007 and this year and she will be sentenced on January 17.

Magistrates bailed her on condition she complies with an existing Bristol City Council restraining order banning her from the school.

Because she did such a sterling job of obeying the last one!

"Human sacrifice, dogs and cats living together... mass hysteria!"

And as David Blunkett warns, the worst thing of all:

Councils are reaching the point where they will only be able to carry out their most basic statutory duties.

O....M....G!!!!!

WON'T SOMEBODY THINK OF THE DIVERSITY CO-ORDINATORS AND THE FIVE-A-DAY CONSULTANTS!!!

Is It 'Cos I Is...? Pt 268974

Imara Jones (Who he? Why, none other than the economic justice contributor for Colorlines.com! Aren't you impressed?) on the awful injustice done to ... well, people with afros, I think:

Over the past year, "natural hair pat downs" have taken place with greater reported frequency. The fact that they occur at all underscores that America's post-racial future still has roots in its racist past.

With a twice-elected black man as the country's chief executive, how could the TSA get it so wrong?

So black Americans should be exempt from the stupid screening laws that everyone else has to undergo because Obama!

Yeah, right. Give him a call on your ObamaPhone and tell him about it, Imara...

Chapter 542 In 'Piers Morgan Just Says...

...The First Idiotic Thing That Pops Into His Head':

CNN host Piers Morgan has said he believes the Bible and the U.S. Constitution are 'inherently flawed' and that the Bible needs an amendment changing its stance on same-sex marriage.

*boggle*

The man is, of course, a smug, self-publicising fool. The best thing the Americans could do is to simply ignore him.

This Is Why No-One Will Come To Help...

Last week, this reality show clip did the rounds on Twitter, with many of the police bemoaning the fact that the bystanders did nothing to help the officer.

Many people pointed out that, had they attempted to wade in, they'd probably have been nicked themselves.  It was pooh-poohed, of course.

And yet...

District Judge Daniel Curtis said Crompton went beyond his public duty and his sentence sent out the message that a police officer is not "beyond the law".

Crompton was given a 12-month community order, 150 hours of unpaid work, told to pay costs of £1,500 and £500 in compensation to his victim.

Crompton wasn't on duty at the time.

District Judge Curtis said: "On the Sunday before Christmas, staff at Winteringham Fields were taken out by Colin McGurran for some drinks as a thanks for their hard work.

"They had been in the Bay Horse public house from 4.30pm onwards.

"At around 8.30pm, Colin Crompton and his wife arrived at the Bay Horse as they wanted a quiet drink.

"They decided to move on to the Ferry Boat. The Winteringham Fields group stayed for about an hour longer before moving on to the Ferry Boat as they did not want to disturb the quiz night."

Witnesses had described the atmosphere in the pub as "tense" and a series of minor disagreements took place. It was at this point Mr Oades was asked to leave the pub by the landlady. Moments later, he tried to return through a side entrance that was being blocked by the defendant.

Judge Curtis said: "Colin McGurran told staff to finish their drinks and leave.

"Thomas Oades felt a tug on him by the defendant who told him to get out.

"He was grabbed by Crompton, who had both hands around his neck and the victim found it hard to breathe."

He added: "You slammed the young man down on a wall and repeatedly punched him,"

He suffered swelling and bruising to both eyes, dried blood under the nostrils, swelling to his mouth, and red marking to his arms, neck and shoulders.

Off-duty cop assists landlady in removing drunken troublesome youth. Gets accused of excessive violence. Will now probably lose his job.

Now, still expect members of the public to wade in?

At The Risk Of Sounding Like Tevye, 'Tradition!'

Croydon Guardian:

Three men have been arrested after a mass brawl involving multiple stabbings broke out at a wake.

Gosh, stabbings? At a wake? Who could do such a thing? The 'Guardian' is reticent about giving further details.

This Is Croydon:

A "vendetta" within two warring traveller communities led to three men being stabbed after a brawl during a wake at a pub.

Shocker, I'm sure you'll agree. It's so unexpected...

"Ye Canna' Change The Laws Of Physics!"

Sue Hitchings and her husband Robert visited Knowle Post Office in Wells Road on Saturday to pay bills and to buy stamps.

But as they were queuing to be served a staff member approached them and said Mrs Hitchings would have to wait outside because her wheelchair was taking up too much space.

The couple believe Mrs Hitchings was discriminated against because of her disability.

Well, of course they do! However, the postmaster has to consider other things:

But the sub-postmaster who runs the post office has told The Post that banning large electric wheelchairs is not discrimination but a "health and safety issue".

It's quite simple - they can't fit in the shop! Naturally, that doesn't stop the usual disability advocates from demanding the moon on a stick:

Cheri Wilkins, chief executive officer of West of England Centre for Inclusive Living (WECIL), said that in an ideal world everyone with an impairment would have access to all public places and services.

She said the Equality Act 2010 was a positive step towards a reduction in discrimination, but believes there is still a lot more that needs to be done.

"This is a common problem that arises around access for disabled people," she said. "Many people do need to use wider wheelchairs and if a shop aisle is not wide enough, it does exclude them."

Well, Cheri, sweetie, just what are shopkeepers supposed to do? Apply for an exemption from the laws of physics?

You really should have learned at school that two objects can't occupy the same space at the same time...

The sub-postmaster of Knowle Post Office, who refused to give his name to The Post, claims he previously checked with The Post Office Ltd and Bristol City Council that the set-up of his shop was acceptable.

He said the aisles between the Londis convenience store part of the shop and the post office part were wide enough for manual wheelchairs but not wide enough for electric wheelchairs, like the one Mrs Hitchings uses.

He said: "Large electric wheelchairs don't fit down the narrow aisles because they are too wide and there's no turning space for them.

"We go out of our way to help all our customers, especially those with disabilities.

"I have asked many people in electric or motorised wheelchairs to stay outside while we get them what they want, or a family member gets it for them from the post office.

"We have had people in motorised wheelchairs lose control in the past. One customer had his foot run over, another was hit by a wheelchair and once a wheelchair user collided with our lottery machine. It is a health and safety issue.

"I've explained many, many times to many people and normally they don't have a problem. I also informed Post Office Ltd and the city council about it, as we are providing a public service. Neither of them raised any concerns."

It comes down, as it always does, to 'reasonable access'.

Sadly, some people just aren't reasonable! The law should maybe have accounted for that...

Seeing Out 2012 With A MONA Story?

A woman waiting at a bus stop in Streatham has died after being hit by a car involved in a collision in Norbury a few minutes earlier.

Unusually for this time of year, it doesn't seem to have been a drink-drive incident:

The first collision occurred at 5am between two cars in London Road at the junction with Ederline Avenue in Norbury.

Following the crash, involving an Audi and a Volkswagen, there was an altercation involving a number of men.

When plain clothes police officers, who had been on duty nearby, intervened, a number of men made off from the scene in the Audi.

Officers stayed with the injured driver of the Volkswagen and the man was taken to hospital where his condition is critical.

Police do not know at this time whether his injuries were sustained in the collision or the subsequent assault.

It tells you quite a bit about the assault that the injuries are indistinguishable from a car crash, eh?

It was then the bus stop incident occurred, killing a woman outright and severely injuring a man. Any description of the suspects beyond 'men', officers?

The occupants of the car left the scene before the police arrived.

Ah. Right. We'll all look out for 'occupants' then...

Update: Well, whaddaya know!? The 'Mail' has also dropped all reports of an 'altercation'. Curious.

Maybe It Does Come From Being 'A Professional Footballer'....

...and maybe it comes from something else:

"You have shown no remorse and you have not got the faintest idea what you put this woman through. You are only interested in what you want and think you deserve.

"Whether or not that comes from being a professional footballer, I don't know, but arrogance like that is simply not acceptable in this society."

Well, look at the circumstances:

The court heard how Ada met the woman at a club in London's West End in February this year. It was told that the pair exchanged phone numbers and arranged to meet up the following night at the woman's home.

The jury heard how Ada, now playing for Conference team Ebbsfleet United, suggested bringing a friend along but could not get hold of one. He arrived alone and he, the woman and her friend drank vodka.

But the court was told Ada's demeanour changed after a few hours and he demanded to be with the victim alone. He told her he had made "the effort and sacrifice" to come to her, before forcing himself on her and making her perform sex acts.

And just where was the woman's 'friend' at this point? Did she leave as demanded? Why?

After being told to leave, Ada sent a text saying: "I am sorry, I was drunk" and then, in a phone call to her friend, said: "I am sorry I forced her, but she had led me on," the jury heard.

Yes, yes. I know. But did she really expect him to think he'd been invited over to play 'Scrabble'?

Ada was arrested the next day at the Brewers' training ground. The court heard he initially denied that he had touched her.

However, he later told detectives he knew his victim's "type", as they wanted to grab hold of a footballer as it would give them a better and more glamorous life.

To most feminists, he might well be a lousy raping scumbag (but then, to a lot, all men are, regardless).

But...he's not entirely wrong, is he? And the role of the 'friend' in this whole affair is an odd one, I think you'll agree...

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!"

Here's hoping everyone is having a great Christmas!

Normal service will resume on Boxing Day!

Let's See Them Enforce The 'No Peeing In The Pool' Rule Too...

Compulsory canine life jackets at pet day care and boarding facilities across Colorado could become reality under rules being drafted by the Pet Animal Care Facilities Program, a division of the Colorado Department of Agriculture.

Seriously?!

Yes. And not just lifejackets, there must be a doggy 'Baywatch' too!

The draft rules state that "every dog must wear a personal flotation device while in or while having access to a pool area whenever the pool water is deeper than the height of the dog at its shoulder."

They also stipulate that the pool must have at least one lifeguard on duty to watch over the bedraggled barkers.

I'd say they jumped the shark here, but, well...

Vive La France! Again!

OK, yes, it was suspended. But as we are always told at this time of year, it's the thought that counts...

A French psychiatrist has been convicted of manslaughter six years after one of her patients hacked an elderly man to death. Danielle Canarelli, 58, was handed a one-year suspended prison sentence for her 'grave error' in failing to recognise that her paranoid schizophrenic patient Joël Gaillard posed a public risk.

Refreshing, eh?

The doctor, who has over 30 years of experience and currently works at Marseille's Edouard-Toulouse hospital, was also ordered to pay 8,500 euros to the victim's children, in the groundbreaking case that could affect the way patients are treated.

Better and better...

'If a psychiatrist lives in fear of being sentenced, it will have very real consequences and probably lead to harsher treatment of patients,' said Canarelli's lawyer, Sylvain Pontier.

Yes, but if it saves one life, Sylvain! Isn't that the pious retort of those who'd restrict essential liberties in other circumstances?

So, I Guess They Will Just Be Left With 'Harsh Language'?

Or with this:

Or this:

Or I guess about 10 of these (with body armour) could flatten the 'child':

I'm sure none of those methods are likely to cause 'potentially fatal health problems'...

...yesterday a campaigner condemned the use of Tasers on children, and called for an outright ban on firing the devices at under-18s.

And how are they supposed to tell if they are under 18..? Who could possibly come up with something so stu...

Oh. Of course.

Sophie Khan from McMillan Williams Solicitors...

No-one anyone needs to pay the slightest bit of attention to then.

On The Twelfth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...the reversal of traditional morality. Because it's something those icky conservatives do:

Sex is good whether you're married or not, and certainly folks who wait until marriage can have a lot of sex once they tie the knot. But waiting until marriage often means both early marriage and conservative views on marriage and gender...

Also, dithering and indecision, a blissful ignorance of how they come across, moral equivalence between the bullies and the bullied, a curious belief that criminality 'just happens', a strange blindness in hiring staff, the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Started The Christmas Drinks Party Early, 'Mail'?

/facepalm

Mind you, there's a lot of it going around...

Move Over, Horatio! Step Aside, Grissom!

...this is a job for CSI: Tealing (Avian Division)!

Mr Donaldson, 39, a janitor at Dundee University, said he believes the mystery bird was killed on the spot by a bigger animal.

And, clearly, he's an expert...

He said: 'I'm baffled by what this bird was. 'Some people have speculated it might have been an ostrich but it doesn't look exactly like an ostrich to me.

Janitor training at Stirling University is more intensive than I thought!

'And even if that's what it was, what was it doing running about an abandoned airfield?

'I can think of no logical explanation.

Really? Not going for the UFO link then?

'The bird has clearly been killed here, by what I don't know. It looks like it's been moved around by whatever was eating it.

'But it was still fresh, and it stank a bit.'

Ah. Right. The possibility that it's a dead pet that someone's dumped for the foxes is out of the question, then?

As yet, no one has been able to come up with an explanation for the bizarre find.

Eh..? I just did!

Sunday Funnies Extra...

'Tis the season, after all...

 

Sunday Funnies...

Luckily, it's probably too late to order any of these...

On The Eleventh Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...dithering and indecision:

Although the teenagers that were arrested played for Nieuw-Sloten, some of them lived in other parts of Nieuw-West, an area with a diverse ethnic mix and not without its problems. Baadoud, who was born in Morocco, says that parental responsibility is a big issue there. "We have a group of parents that when they come with their children [to football], you really don't want to have them there. And we have another group of parents, they don't come. They even don't know in which team their children are playing; they deliver them at the door and they drive away. There are people who don't even know the teacher of their son or the team leader of the club. There is a lot of work to be done."

He will not, however, accept that the finger of blame can be pointed at one group of people. "It's very easy to scream and to say it's a Moroccan problem. On the other hand, I don't want to say we have no problems. I am very open and clear that we have to discuss. Families really need help and I'm trying to open their eyes. But if you stand outside and you scream it's a problem, it won't be solved and it might create another problem – people will feel: 'We are not welcome.'"

And someone else, later in the article, wonders why they have a population that has no respect for authority...

Also, a blissful ignorance of how they come across, moral equivalence between the bullies and the bullied, a curious belief that criminality 'just happens', a strange blindness in hiring staff, the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Something In The 'Guardian' I Can Agree With!

And it's this, by Charlotte Higgins:

Every midwinter, as the year dies, there is a ritual in which some grownups, old enough to know better, indulge: we reread Susan Cooper's children's story The Dark Is Rising.

You're not wrong, Charlotte...

It's an illuminating interview.

*curls up with a whiskey and a book*

Firemen Aren't Social Workers, And Cops Aren't Mindreaders...

In March, Humberside Fire and Rescue Service was called to Jess's house when she set her bedroom alight. Realising something was wrong, the attending crew manager filed a PN1 form, an internal document used when officers come into contact with a child they believe might be vulnerable. However, his concerns were not shared with health professionals or social services.

The paperwork was lost in the system. Would it have made a difference? Doubtful, as she was already well known to the appropriate authorities:

Jess first came to the attention of social workers in October last year after she accused her dad of hitting her. An investigation showed her claims were completely untrue.

Soon afterwards Jess began to self-harm and, on November 23 last year, she was referred to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Services. Meetings continued until February 29, when Jess and her mum both felt things had improved and she was discharged.

She then set the fire. Did her parents take any action, or did they think 'Oh, well, the fire service'll do it'?

The officer argued any changes to a firefighter's role, such as expecting them to identify children at risk, must be properly thought out.

He said: "The fire service has to evolve and nobody's got any problem with that. We're all happy to evolve if the training is given properly.

"If we're going to take these things on, we need the correct training, not half an hour on a wet afternoon."

Maybe the best thing to do is...not take them on? Stick to the job you are paid and trained for?

Meanwhile...

It's two years since their daughter was murdered, but for the first time Joanna Yeates' parents have criticised the police investigation that eventually caught her killer.

*sigh*

The body of the 25-year-old landscape architect was found by dog walkers in Failand on Christmas Day 2010 after she had been missing for eight days.

Her parents said they now think police were not aware that their daughter's killer, neighbour Vincent Tabak, had been alone in his flat on the night she vanished.

They began treating him as a suspect only after a phone call to detectives from his girlfriend Tanja when the pair were away on holiday in Holland for new year.

Yes, that's right. They started treating him as a suspect when evidence emerged of his involvement.

Before that, how could they possibly do anything? I'm as fond of armchair quarterbacking as the next blogger, but let's be realistic here!

You Fooled Me?! You Must Be A Soooper Genius!

There's always a few stories every year of the greedy and the mildly-criminal gullible fools who get duped by conmen. You know, usually if it's too good to be true, that's a clue.

And those stories are often filed in the 'And now...' section, with the sneering contempt of the editor practically wafting off the page. 'Ah', you can imagine them thinking, 'the lower classes are so dim!'

So, when they are the ones duped, it's time to break out that popcorn!

We feel so stupid: how could my wife and I have been conned out of more than £7,000 by one phone conversation? The answer is that the scam was brilliant in design and execution.

Well, of course it must have been! It was you, after all,. And you wouldn't fall for anything other than a scam conceived and executed by a Moriarty, a Napoleon of crime, a Hannibal Lecter of scamsters. A perfect con with no flaws.

So...how'd it go down?

It began with a phone call after dinner on a Friday night. My wife answered the phone and the caller announced herself as ‘DCI Jane Seymour of the Serious Fraud Office’.

The usual story - your card's been used in a scam. So...call the officer back to verify she's who she says she is? Our hero is prepared! Good lad:

Was DCI Seymour who she said she was? How could we know she was really working for the Serious Fraud Office? Her ANSWER turned us from cautious sceptics into credulous fools. ‘Call 999 and check me out,’ she urged.

Whoa, Nellie! Dial 999? The emergency number? The ones the police keep haranguing us should only be used in an emergency?

FAIL!!

So we did. I put the phone down, picked it up again and dialled 999. The dialling tone was normal, the phone rang and the response was as prompt and efficient as a law-abiding citizen could wish for.

*sigh* Scammers always are. They know you catch more flies with honey than vinegar...

‘We can have your cards blocked immediately,’ said DCI Seymour to reassure us. ‘New cards can be delivered to your house in three working days, or five for the foreign cards. But first we’ll need your PIN numbers.’ That should, of course, have rung alarm bells.

Well, duh!

How many times have we all been told, ‘Never, never give your PIN number to anyone. Your bank will never ask for it’?

Well, quite!!

We hesitated — and this is where DCI Seymour scored again. ‘Don’t tell me the codes,’ she said. ‘Tap them into the phone and they will be sent straight to our technical team.’

Because it's OK to give the codes to them. Riiiight.

DCI Seymour kept reassuring us that all would be well. ‘Are you OK? Do you have enough money for the weekend? We can get you emergency funds of £300 delivered to you by 3pm tomorrow. We’ll debit it from your HSBC account and I’ll call you again tomorrow at noon.’

Because that's the sort of service you can expect from the police, right? Or rather, it's the sort of service that people like the author fondly think the police should offer.

And when she said she would send a courier round to pick up our compromised cards, it seemed so reasonable.

/doublefacepalm

The conclusion to this sorry tale? Well, as you can guess, the penny finally dropped. But it took a while.

The police — the real police — have been sympathetic and tell us that the con is targeted at the well-to-do and the elderly who may not be as techno-savvy as younger account holders.

Apart from the 'not hanging up their end', there's nothing 'techno-savvy' needed here. Most of it's good, old fashioned suspicion. And also a bit of worldly experience - is what they are saying plausible?

And I'm afraid the answer was a big 'No!'. Unless, of course, you inhabit the quaint liberal world where everything is just supposed to work that way. The police will liaise with your bank? Why, yes. Of course they will! That's just how it works, isn't it?

So let's hope that the next time an idiot swaps his hard-earned for a laptop that turns out to be a bag of water bottles, the newspaper won't sneer.

But of course, they probably will.

More Of This, Please!

Just ignore the bleeding hearts who'll squeal about 'human rights':

Town hall chiefs are using Kiaran Stapleton’s murder conviction to help kick his parents out of their home.

The M.E.N told yesterday how Salford town hall has applied to evict the killer’s mum Billie-Jean and dad Tony from their council house.

It was claimed the Stapleton family have ‘made life a misery’ for their neighbours around Regent Square in Ordsall.

A possession notice against the Stapletons has now revealed the criminal convictions that council bosses are relying on to prove their case.

No, it's not just his convictions, either:

But the council have also listed a criminal conviction against his mum Billie-Jean Stapleton as part of the reasons for evicting the family.

The possession notice says: “On April 27, 2011 until October 27, 2011, you permitted the use of premises (on Regent Square, Ordsall) for use of smoking cannabis. You received a 12 month conditional discharge and were ordered to pay £85 costs.”

Yes, I'm sure there will be people who will complain that this is too harsh.

To which I say 'You live next door to them, then. Don't expect decent people to..'

On The Tenth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...a blissful ignorance of how they come across:

The so-called Jessica Ennis Generation (those born in the 80s and 90s, like me) was portrayed as more tolerant of, and essentially not bothered by, mixed race families.

It followed other recent reports which claimed that mixed race people are more attractive, more intelligent and biologically superior to their single race counterparts. But have the prejudices which blighted mixed race people and couples completely disappeared over the last 20 years?

Yes, you read that right - someone who writes approvingly of how reports suggest his kind are better than everyone else is pontificating on racism.

YCMIU!

Also, moral equivalence between the bullies and the bullied, a curious belief that criminality 'just happens', a strange blindness in hiring staff, the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Hey, Cameron's Cabinet Is Doing Something Right After All!

That 'something' being this:

A month ago, alarmed by moves to water down a key protection arising from Sir William Macpherson's inquiry into the death of her son, the campaigner wrote to the prime minister, the deputy prime minister, Nick Clegg, and the other major party leaders. She told the Guardian the letter had been ignored. An earlier communication seeking to establish relations with the coalition at the outset also went without reply.

Hurrah! Who the hell are you, and why should you think you have the ear of ministers? Hell, as DumbJon points out, even the business advisors don't get that...

"With the new government in, the whole thing around race has changed completely," said Lawrence, who will unveil a series of events on Wednesday to mark the 20th anniversary next year of Stephen's murder.

"Race is definitely not on the government's agenda. They have done away with the stop-and-search recording. Even before they came in, they talked about changing things, particularly on stop and search; that they would do away with the forms and they have done that. "I don't really understand it because we all want a society in which we can live safely and live freely and to have police officers doing what they need to do on the street. But when it comes to race, they feel as if they are doing us a favour rather than doing what is right."

If you really want a society in which you can 'live safely and live freely', Doreen, why don't you turn your attention to your own so-called 'community'?

Because it seems to me that the biggest killer of young black youth is....other young black youth.

Oh, and Andy Warhol says 'You've had more than 15 minutes, love!'. I guess the 'Guardian' will always be around to take your call, though...

What Do You Call People Who Just Don't Learn?

A former York postman is recovering after a dog bit his finger as he was pushing a leaflet through a letterbox.

Yeah. I know...

He and his wife aren't exactly rocket scientists, mind you:

Mal said they drove off to a nearby hair salon, Classic Cutz, where owner Terry Smith wrapped the finger in kitchen roll to try to stem the flow of blood before they drove on to York Hospital.

A....hair salon?!

He said he had told police about the incident but the law did not allow for any action to be taken over dogs attacking people while on their own premises.

It seems I'm not the only person who lacks sympathy:

AMAJET says...

I dont see why the owner should be classed as an 'irresponsible minority'?, how can you possibly train a dog not to find 4 wiggling sausage fingers to good an opportunity to miss when someone shoves them through your door. Moral of this story is don't shove your junk mail through our doors. It's appalling how much rubbish gets posted through these days. Btw sorry to hear about your finger.get well soon.

Quite!

cityforthepremier says...

Well done Fido for making a stand against junk mailers. What a shame you can't bite those PPI tossers phoning every bloody day too!

Now there's an idea...

Yes, I Do Believe The Children Are Our Future...

...and it's a future that scares me. Maybe there's a reason so many schools are so hung up on tolerating bullies. It's because they can't get any backing to do anything about them.

Not from the education tribunal:

The independent tribunal panel said the school "treated Max unfavourably because of something arising from his disability" in its decision last month.

The exclusion was ruled to be "disproportionate" and the use of the BIC "not appropriate to address or modify Max’s behaviour".

Details of his behaviour? It includes 'swearing, shouting out in class and refusing to obey teachers'.
Which the school dealt with by removing him from class. You know, to prevent any issues for the other children attending school. Does the tribunal give a tuppeny damn about them?

And the reason he was finally excluded? That was for

'refusing to visit the BIC as punishment for an unfounded physical assault allegation against a teacher.'

Yeah. Savour that one.

And certainly they get no backing from parents:

The five-year-old has bitten and punched other children and staff, thrown school equipment and stolen fruit.

On one occasion his entire class was evacuated to protect other pupils.

The last straw came when he kicked a teacher in the face as she bent over his chair.

But his parents claim he is well-behaved at home and say he has been ‘thrown on the scrapheap’ by the school.

‘They said they had to exclude him to ensure the safety of the staff and pupils but I don’t understand how a five-year-old can pose so much of a threat,’ said his father, Cameron, 27, a care home manager.

Volunteers to go round to Cameron's house to throw things, scream, bite, punch and kick him, anyone?

His mother, Laura, 22, a chef from Braintree, Essex, said: ‘Before Logan started school we didn’t know he had this side to him.

'It is like we are talking about two completely different boys. At home he does exactly what he is told and we have never seen him do any of the things the school say he did.

'He really is a clever boy and now that is being wasted.’

He's clever, all right. He knows not to shit on his own doorstep!

Mr and Mrs Steed believe their son should be at a mainstream school where he can socialise with other children.

And if he doesn't feel like 'socialising'? Well, I guess the other kids will just have to put up with it. He's not much of a threat, is he?

Set up a panel, by all means. Talk all you like. But action? Oooooh, no. We draw the line at that.

On The Ninth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...moral equivalence between the bullies and the bullied:

So, I put it to the head teacher: what punishment are you giving these boys for making my son’s life a misery? ‘Oh, none,’ she replied. ‘We’re going to set up a drama group to help the three of them (including Monty) deal with their social responses.’

Social responses? What on earth was she talking about? I felt like she had swallowed a whole political correctness dictionary!

I rushed from the room, went straight home and told Monty that if either of those boys came anywhere near him again he had my permission to punch them — a social response I felt was quite appropriate under the circumstances. But I knew he wouldn't  He’s no angel, but punching is not his style.

Then the school suddenly changed tack. ‘This isn't actually a bullying matter,’ the head teacher informed me at the beginning of week three. ‘Bullying is the relentless targeting of one individual, and these two boys behave like this towards every child in the class.’

She then suggested — with Monty present — that it might be best to just ‘put up with it, and stop taking their behaviour so personally’.

And people wonder why the teaching profession is increasingly despised..?

Also, a curious belief that criminality 'just happens', a strange blindness in hiring staff, the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Straight From The Horse's Mouth!

Stephen Sikpi, 23, singled out dozing passengers on late night services between London Liverpool Street and Southend Victoria. He stole expensive belongings including iPhones and iPads and even an entire rucksack.

He was eventually caught after a tracker was identified on a stolen iPhone which led police to his girlfriend’s home.

Thanks be to technology!

Elizabeth Connolly, mitigating, said the first theft had been entirely opportunistic and he had no previous offences. He had only received a caution in the past.

She said: “Because he got away with it he then with it he then disengaged with reality, with the reality of what he was doing was wrong, the reality of the affect (sic) on the victims.”

There you have it - what better proof that short, lenient sentences don't work?

She said that he had difficulty “engaging” with his probation officer and so had probably not given the best impression in his pre-sentence report.

Translation: chippy little scumbag smarted off to his probation officer because, who cares what goes down in those reports anyway?

He was jailed for eight months. No order was made for costs or compensation due to his circumstances.

That'll teach him!

"Beat the clock, ya gotta beat the clock.."

Some fun to be had in Plymouth:

A new type of crossing is up and running on Royal Parade.

Oh?

The signals, next to the Big Screen, were installed this week and count down to show pedestrians exactly how long they have to cross the road.

A green man still lights up when it is safe to cross, with a countdown before the red man appears to let people know they should clear the crossing.

Oh boy! That's not going to have some unforeseen consequences, is it?

How Is This Not Attempted Murder?

The suspects fled to a red Hyundai car and as the police sergeant stood in the road and raised his hand to stop it Togher accelerated into him, the court heard.

The impact lifted him off his feet, said Mr Doherty, but the officer gave chase and caught up with Togher when her escape was blocked at a junction.

If you drive a half-tionne of metal and glass at someone at speed, how are you not attempting to kill them?

Heroin addict Togher, of Martock Road, Bedminster, was jailed for a total of 11 months yesterday after pleading guilty to theft, dangerous driving and assault with intent to resist arrest at an earlier hearing.

*speechless*

Judge Grainger disqualified Togher from driving for two years.

That's just adding insult to injury!!

On The Eighth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

... a curious belief that criminality 'just happens':

At that time, Sodiq dreamed of being a doctor and was planning to go to college. I left to focus on film school.

When I came back, I couldn't understand how it had all gone so wrong.

Sodiq, now 20, is starting a 30-year jail sentence in Feltham Young Offenders Institution for murder. The teenager who died was Sylvester Akapalara, who had been to the same school as Sodiq and was a very promising athlete. Both he and Sodiq had dreams but both had got caught up in street life.

Why did it happen? It's complicated.

Get that? It's complicated....

Also, a strange blindness in hiring staff, the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Ex Libris: ‘Bag Of Bones’

On a very hot day in August 1994, my wife told me she was going down to the Derry Rite Aid to pick up a refill on her sinus medicine prescription – this is stuff you can buy over the counter these days, I believe. I’d finished my writing for the day and offered to pick it up for her. She said thanks, but she wanted to get a piece of fish at the supermarket next door anyway; two birds with one stone and all of that. She blew a kiss at me off the palm of her hand and went out. The next time I saw her she was on TV. That’s how you identify the dead here in Derry – no walking down a subterranean corridor with green tiles on the walls and long fluorescent bars overhead, no naked body rolling out of a chilly drawer on casters; you just go into an office marked PRIVATE and look at a TV screen and say yep or nope.

I’m a great fan of Stephen King, and have – so far – read all of his books to date. But I found this particular novel to be one of his best-written, a true ‘old fashioned’ ghost story given a modern twist.

It's a great book to curl up and read on a winter's evening in front of a fire, with an intriguing mystery at the heart of it, and a bone-chilling supernatural revenge motive. 

I thought it’d make the best tv/film adaptation too, being almost completely free of any of King's references to his overarching 'mythology' but it was not to be; last year's US tv adaptation attempt was woeful, though it tried hard to capture the essence of the novel.

I hope you've enjoyed this little bit of monthly bibliophilia. There were several books just falling outside my selected twelve, and writing this has actually prompted me to read a few of these again. Chief amongst them Katherine Neville's 'The Eight', a superb dual-timeline novel about a mystical chess set, and Melanie Rawn's 'Dragon Prince' trilogy.

So, what shall I do for next year, I wonder?

"...and hear the lamentation of the women."

Hey, Conan was right!

The family broke down and wept in the dock, except for William, who stood stoney faced.

Mary, also known as Breda, screamed uncontrollably and frantically pulled her hair as the first verdict, against her husband was read out.

"Oh daddy! Oh daddy!" she yelled. "Mind the children. Why are you doing this? I have never done anything to anyone in all my life."

Six security staff struggled to maintain order while the verdicts were read out. One security guard was injured as family members leapt to their feet and Gloucestershire Police officers in the front row helped eject family members from the public gallery.

Extra security guards rushed into court to physically remove relatives.

John Connors' wife was carried from the court after trying to climb out of the public gallery into the dock. As she left, she wailed: "Please, please, I'm asking you no. Don't do this."

Miles Connors' wife was also carried screaming from the court.

Who said we had abolished slavery in England?

It's Not Working! Dial Up The Hyperbole!

Since no-one bought the last sob story, they decided to step up a gear:

Thousands of London children are going to school hungry because their parents are too poor to afford breakfast.

A harrowing investigation reveals today that scores of children have even passed out in class due to lack of food.

Bullshit! Show me the evidence for this claim!

Three quarters of teachers interviewed by the London Assembly in a snapshot survey said they had personally taken action to help hungry children.

Well, of course they did! Even on an anonymous survey, I'm sure the progressives like to enjoy that warm glow that comes from feeling magnanimous, even if you are just fantasising...

Of those who said they had “taken action” to feed pupils, 60 per cent said they provided food at their own expense.

We must be payin' 'em too much! Let's hope the school governors remember this when they start to go on strike for more pay...

Fiona Twycross, who is leading the study, said: “It’s heart-breaking to think that children are going to school hungry. Some kids have told us there’s no food in the cupboard at home at all. The problem might be even more widespread than we think. There are probably thousands going hungry.

“You can’t see a hungry child, you just see a child who is listless or a bit ratty and lacking concentration, so unless a teacher spots it and asks the right questions we just don’t know.

“Thank goodness for caring teachers who pay for food for hungry pupils out of their own pockets – although it is scandalous that they have to in this day and age. What worries me even more is what is happening during the school holidays when this extra help isn't available.”

Gosh, Fiona, maybe the parents will have to use their KittyBingo money to feed their brats instead?

Investigators have uncovered harrowing tales. One teacher came across a child standing outside a cookery class sniffing the air as cakes were baked inside.

I stood by the bakery counter in M&S the other day, sniffing the air in similar fashion. Because it smelled good, not because I was starving!

Good grief, these people make the Sandy Hook gun banners look like an oasis of calm reason and informed debate!

"I felt a great disturbance in the (Police) Force, as if millions of voices suddenly cried out in terror and were suddenly silenced."

"I fear something terrible has happened."

A constable is now known to have falsely claimed he witnessed Andrew Mitchell’s encounter with two other officers in Downing Street when he is alleged to have called them ‘f***ing plebs’.

And CCTV footage screened by Channel 4 News last night cast doubt on the widely-publicised police version of the incident on the evening of September 19.

Ooops! Cue frantic spinning from those who pinned their hopes of unseating the government on this.

But on the bright side, suddenly there's a new found respect for what the public thinks, at least!

*settles down with huge box of popcorn*

On The Seventh Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...a strange blindness in hiring staff:

"He asks a lot of questions. Every day he asks if Omar is alive or dead. He knows what happened, he was there, but he needs to make sense of it," says his father, Jihad Misharawi, whose family was devastated in an inferno on the first full day of last month's war.

That's BBC freelance video operator Jihad Misharawi to you..!

Also, the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Maybe Some Pubs Deserve To Close...

...and not due to the smoking ban or the increase in supermarket alcohol availability, either:

The three, said to have been drunk when they committed the offence, have now been given community sentences at Bridlington Magistrates' Court.

Katya Mira, of the RSPCA said: "This was a senseless and sickening attack on some defenseless animals who have done nothing wrong.

"We hope the fact these people were brought to justice sends out a very strong message to others that violence and cruelty to animals is unacceptable and against the law."

Gosh, yes! A 'community punishment'. Ah, if only that meant the community got a chance to come visit them while they spent time in the stocks...

So who are these fine upstanding members of the community?

Daniel Thomas Hall, 21, of Church Lane, Flamborough, Robert Lee, 18, of Lighthouse Road, Flamborough, and Daniel Alan Wood, 18, of the Dog and Duck in Flamborough, all pleaded guilty to causing unnecessary suffering to a protected animal when they appeared at Bridlington Magistrates' Court.

The 'Dog and Duck'..? You're kidding me!

But Daniel Wood's father, David Wood, landlord of the Dog and Duck, said it had been little more than a prank.

He said: "They had just been out drinking. It was just a stupid prank, it wasn't a big thing.

"Daniel is back at sea fishing. It's all behind him now."

Really? Well, the locals and regulars can decide that, can't they?

And sea fishing is a dangerous business in winter....

A Coroner With Cojones!

The hearing heard about a series of violent incidents, including assaults and a hit-and-run, which North Staffordshire Coroner Ian Smith condemned as "stupid drunken criminality".

Mr Smith ruled Mr Ellahi, who he said was "no stranger" to the criminal courts himself, had been a "willing participant" in the brawl which cost him his life.

Wow!

Not afraid to stand up in the face of 'community pressure':

A charge of manslaughter brought against Munro was dropped following the unrelated death of a key witness.

This left members of the Asian community, including Mr Ellahi's family, angry that justice had not been done.

And not afraid to simply sit there while partisan witnesses get their story in first, either:

The inquest heard a number of differing accounts of the fight.

While memories may be less than perfect after two-and-a-half years, Mr Smith said some witnesses had been "unreliable and unconvincing".

We need more coroners like this!

Don't You Know That It's Different For Girls?

A man who had a six-month fling with a teenage girl has been spared jail.

Cue hired mouthpiece!

Robert Duval, defending, said "Mr Friendship's life had been wrecked by his actions and now he could not even get employment as a cleaner as a result."

He told the judge: "He has never been in trouble in any way, shape or form in his life before these events.

"It is to his credit that he has been as frank as he has to the sexual relationship that has taken place.

"Had he not done so it is probable, although not certain, that he would not have been prosecuted and this matter would have made no news and he would not have appeared in the dock of a crown court in this country. He was not obliged to do that and he has been courageous for doing that.

"This was a genuine case of infatuation. This was not a case of exploitation and there is no evidence of coercion or sophistication or manipulation." Mr Duval added:

"The effects of this case upon him are irretrievable – they are permanent, they are punitive and they are humiliating and distressing."

Wow!

Note: one or two details might have got a bit mixed up...

One to ponder on when you read the next tawdry 'revelations' in the Savile case, eh?

On The Sixth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...the unshakable belief that their desires should be everyone's desire:

A Conservative MP has claimed "most parents" don't want their children to be gay. How can he possibly know? How many has he asked? Certainly not me; if he had, I'd have told him I like having a gay son so much I think everyone should have one.

I mean...what does one say to narcissism like that? Does she want a child, or a prize?

Also, their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Nothing 'Complex' Or 'Unusual' About It...

Remember this story?

Six police officers were treated in hospital after diving into a river in a bid to rescue five occupants of a car which had crashed into the water.

...

Police said the six officers dived into the River Avon in a bid to save the silver BMW's occupants after it crashed into the water today.

Two other women were being interviewed as witnesses in what the Fire Service described as a "complex" and "unusual" incident.

Oh, really? Well, now the court case is over, we can see just what was so 'complex and unusual' about it:

A drink-driver who careered off a city centre bridge, killing a young mum, had been driving with no licence or insurance for 13 years.

A court heard Shennie Jaffer had more than twice the legal limit of alcohol in his breath when tested, nearly three hours after losing control of his BMW car in Passage Street and plunging into the Floating Harbour.

Bristol Crown Court heard Jaffer, of Robertson Road, Easton, had been showing off and refused to slow down or stop even though his terrified passengers – who included his pregnant girlfriend – pleaded with him before the accident at 4am on October 20

....

Jaffer dived into the water several times but his frantic efforts to free her failed and she drowned.

The court heard the 31-year-old then went home, where police later found him and his girlfriend, next to wet clothes. Disoriented Jaffer initially told them they were "corrupt" in targeting him, before saying: "I tried to help her."

...

He had previous convictions for failing to stop after an accident in 2004, when he was banned for a year, and failing to provide a breath specimen in 2009, when he was banned for two years.

Nothing too unusual there. Nothing too unusual about the defence's laughable attempts, either:

Mr Rose said eventually his client walked away in shock and was found at home, disorientated, with his wet clothes beside him.

He said: "That disorientation was more than mere alcohol.

"When first spoken to he was aggressive and defensive. But he admitted matters regarding him driving in the police station.

"He was exuberant that night, in an excess of high spirits. Now he is very subdued, quiet and thoughtful and inevitably affected by it."

Yes, clearly, he's the victim. OK, maybe the punishment from the justice system is the 'complex and unusual' part?

Jaffer was jailed for six years and eight months yesterday...

Nope. Guess not.

There Are 18 Words That Guarantee A Fun Read In A Local Paper...

And those are "Following the death, friends of Mr Williams took to social network site Facebook to pay tribute to him."

Let's hear it, then:

Gemma Squires wrote: "Can't believe your gone.. It doesn't seem real.. R.I.P BIG Cuz.. Gone but never guna b forgotten Love u Always xxxxxxxx."

Jayne 'ebinx' Davies said: "Not sure what to say, you were a big man with a huge heart. Had many laughs n lots of drunken silly times with you. kept expecting to see you out on Sat, it's still such a shock. Hope you're having a blast up there the boys R.I.P Ginge. Gone but never forgotten. xxx."

And the tragic occasion that cut down the life of this potential future brain surgeon?

The man killed in a Swansea Valley car crash was driving a stolen car, police have confirmed.

Andrew Williams, from Clase, died in the collision near Ystradgynlais just after 8am on Saturday.

The 29-year-old was the sole occupant of a silver Honda Civic which left the road and hit a tree near the All Black Arms.

My tiny violin is going to get no airing today...

Well, Don't Be Too Hard On Her...

To the family of the grandmother she killed while texting at the wheel of her car, it could not have been more insensitive.

They had come to court hoping to see Nikita Ainley show some remorse – and not a little humility – at her sentencing over the death of Mary Rutherford.

Instead, they looked on as the 20-year-old arrived tapping away on her phone.

...after all, maybe she was checking in with her 'Weightwatchers' app..?

She got three and a half years. Hope she likes prison young offenders unit food.

On The Fifth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...their belief that extortion and protectionism is just fine and dandy:

In 1947 Congress acted to rein in “Big Labor” by passing (over President Truman’s veto) what came to be known as the Taft-Hartley Act. Among its provisions was a section permitting states to outlaw union shop agreements between workers and management– what some anti-union PR genius labeled “right to work” laws.

These laws bar unions and employers from requiring all employees covered by a collective bargaining agreement to either join the union or pay the equivalent of dues to the union. However unions almost always represent employees who refuse to join or make payments. So these employees receive all the benefits of being union members– the wage and benefit increases negotiated by the union, the right to union representation in grievance and arbitration cases– without paying a dime of the costs. Which is why some of us call these people freeloaders.

Yes indeed, as far as Gene at 'Harry's Place' is concerned, those people who don't want to kick back part of their salary to a cabal they don't want to join are the freeloaders...

Also, shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth! and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Oh, I'm Sure You Can Find A Solution...

Yes, we all saw the reports of the schoolgirls party trashed by freeloading scum whipped up on FaceBook, we all heard the excuses from the party organiser and her mother about how it all transpired, and we all thought 'Who'd be that stupid, not to realise the consequences?'.

But people are. And they've paid a high price for it.

The freeloaders? Well, they are likely to escape:

Mrs Hines has bigger things to worry about. With estimates of up to £30,000 to repair structural damage and replace her furniture, she is in despair about how to find the money.

‘Since Andrew has been gone, money has been tight and I have no idea what we will do,’ she says.

There is little chance of compensation either — although the police have suggested bringing criminal charges, it could be hard to work out who to bring them against.

But, since we are talking about the Essex Farce, there is one culprit that's already been identified, they know the address, they won't need to do any hard work.

Who?

Essex Police confirmed it was currently considering if it is in the public interest to prosecute for a breach of the peace and allowing underage drinking in her home.

An Essex Police spokeswoman said: “Police are working with the family and considering whether any offences have been committed and whether it is in the public interest to prosecute those responsible. Local officers are also in contact with residents of the street to establish a full picture of the events which took place.”

Yup! Prosecute the victim!

/golfclap

God, I Really Don't Want To Read His Origin Story!

A killer discovered with a murder kit in his car has been jailed without limit of time after a judge ruled he posed a lifelong risk to women and children.

Police officers discovered Shane Dobson, who suffers from a hero complex, with the murder kit in Hull's red light area, looking for prostitutes.

Wow! And I thought only last week that I'd obviously not been reading the right comics..!

That's some really odd definition of 'superhero'. Who'd he kill?

Ah.

Now, Dobson, who killed his baby daughter by forcing her to swallow a balloon in 1996 to pretend she was ill, has been given an indefinite life sentence.

Yeah. That's a bit too gritty for Marvel or DC to touch!

Sunday Funnies...

Don't have (Christmas) nightmares...

On The Fourth Day Of Christmas, The Progressives Gave To Me...

...shameless opportunism before the blood's even dry:

All of them convinced that if Obama can just somehow seize the moment and overturn the 2nd Amendment, everything will be sunshine and kittens.

What's that? China? Oh.

Also, the continued infiltration of the justice system, bah humbug, please save the Earth and irrefutable evidence that, at heart, their desire to control the language knows no bounds.

Darwin Award 2012 Still In Play...

...only thanks to the surgeons, mind you:

A fashion craze almost cost a teenage boy his life after he swallowed the magnetic tongue studs he was wearing.

Michael Delaney, 15, was only hours from death and needed surgery when the studs, which are much more powerful than ordinary magnets, began making holes in his digestive system.

Yes. We've been here before! Albeit at least those weren't actually designed to be put in the mouth!

Last night Michael’s family issued a warning to youngsters to be aware of the danger if they were to swallow the studs, which are freely available in Britain. They are popular because they allow teenagers to look as if they have had a piercing without incurring the wrath of their parents.

It'd be safer to have the piercing done, no matter how strict your parents!